Category Archives: His Worship & The Pig

Words by Dave Boulton, music by Jeff Parton

Chorus:
Don’t sell the Cuillins McLeod
They’re your history ancient and proud
Sell all that you hold
Sell your heart/arse sell your soul
But don’t sell the Cuillins McLeod

John McLeod will you listen to reason
McLeod will you listen to me
A man from just South of nowhere very special
Who can’t believe what he just heard on T.V.
Is it true that you’re selling the Cuillins?
The thought turns my stomach to lead
For a man must be blind or be out of his mind
To be doing the things that they said

CHORUS

… Continue reading →

by Dave Boulton

I’ll tell thee a Biblical story
And I hope that I tell it alright
Concerning Goliath the Philistine giant
And David the young Israelite

On the side of the valley of Elah
The Israelites camped in a wood
And on t’other bank in scarlet array
The tents of the Philistines stood

Well insults flew thick across valley
All day and far into the night
There was gesticulating and making rude signs
But both sides seemed reluctant to fight

Said the Philistine general: IT’S SHOCKING
FOR THAT LOT TO TREAT US THIS WAY
And girding his loins he says: LET’S CHOOSE A CHAMPION
And all his lads answer: OKAY!

… Continue reading →

Dave Boulton July 2004

I bet you any money that when you come down to stoke
You’ll think we all talk funny cuz of how the lingoes spoke
It’s like a foreign language a communications maze
But you’ll find you can manage if you memorise this phrase

Chorus
Cost kick a bow agen a wow yed it with thee yed and bost it
Cost kick a bow agen a wow yed it with thee yed and bost it
Repeat ad infinitum to make they asna lost lt
Cost kick a bow agen a wow yed it with thee yed … Continue reading →

I have no gift to bring that could mean anything at all to you
no silver words to say no simple way to make a dream come true
and so I wrote this song it’s just another one
didn’t know what else to do
so part of me can be with you at Christmas

You’re where you have to be the same is true of me I think you know
but through the painted smiles I’ll fly across the miles to you at home
and when the laughter’s loud and you’re lonely in the crowd
remember I am lonely … Continue reading →

Download lyric sheet with chords

11 hours into a seven hour day, third double shift in a row
It’s ten o’clock Friday and Monday morning seems like a lifetime ago
There’s a hush like before a performance as we wait for the rush to begin
And there’s little doubt when the pubs chuck ‘em out
The lads‘ll start wheeling them in

Chorus:
Who ever said thank God it’s friday ?
has never spent Friday night here
Hasn’t seen all the sites the results of the fight s
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Download lyric sheet with chords

Who is the lady we all love to fear
Attila Attila the hen
Who can with one look reduce grown men to tears
Attila Attila the hen

Attila don’t flex and Attila don’t bend
Cross her once and I bet you wont do it again
She’ll go right down your throat and straight out t’other end
She’s Attila Attila The Hen

Now Attila don’t swear and Attila don’t cuss
Attila Attila the hen
But she still makes Ann Widdicome look like a wus
… Continue reading →

Words By Dave Boulton May 09
Download lyric sheet of shorter version with chords

We’ve always had our poultices our potions and our pills
To rectify our maladies infirmities and ills
Take no more cures or hurts endure be you halt or lame or barmy
You’ll be right as rain and free from pain with a great big sausage sarnie

Refrain
A great big sausage sarnie a great big sausage sarnie
You’ll be right as rain and free from pain with a great big sausage sarnie

Some swear … Continue reading →

Download lyrics sheet with chords

I don’t need you to give me a good talking to
I don’t need your assistance or help
If I’m heading for trouble and maybe that’s true
I’ll have no-one to blame but myself
I’ve got nothing tell you there’s nothing to say
And I don’t want to cause you distress or dismay
Don’t go away angry just please go away

Chorus:
I just need a good leaving alone
I just need a good leaving alone
Don’t e-mail don’t visit don’t FAX and don’t … Continue reading →